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Seeing things only from our own
perspectives is a pretty emotional stance in itself; it's an easy way to
protect ourselves from other people's thoughts and other people's
feelings. Whatever emotion we may use to justify our behavior, life is
always easier if we have someone else to blame when things aren't
running smoothly. Whether we blame the other person, or fate, or life
itself, it "feels better" if whatever is happening isn't our fault!
We've all heard that "we create our own reality," but do we really
understand what that means? If we did, then we'd also understand why the
most difficult part of "being aware" is being aware of the reality (or
the working environment) that we create by the way we respond to the
people, the events and the circumstances in our lives. Once we truly
realize that "what goes around comes around," we see our own
anger, our
own resentment, or our own frustration coming back at us, and we realize
that the only light at the end of our emotional tunnel is the headlight
on a train coming straight towards us, fueled by our own negative
energy.
It is at this point on our personal path that we begin to see - and
accept - that most of the crisis, problems and
"less than positive"
relationships in our lives are created by us for our own emotional
needs, and we can begin deciding which of those crisis, which of those
problems, and which of those "less than positive" relationships we want
to eliminate from our lives in the name of "growth."
Before we can move past the "crisis" and into "positive problem
solving," we have to be willing to admit that our conscious thoughts can
justify almost any behavior. We've spent our entire lives feeling that
we have the right to be angry, that we have the right to seek revenge,
to prove our point, to make our egos feel better if someone else makes
it feel bad. We can justify being downright hateful if someone hurts us,
or rejects us, or disappoints us in some way.
Perhaps earlier on our path, we chose - as so many people do - to learn
through negative experience because we didn't trust ourselves to pay
attention to the life lessons at play unless they were really
uncomfortable to be involved in. The more "emotional crisis" we worked
our way through, the more confident we became that we were strong enough
to survive the storms of life. It's when we realize that we can not only
survive but actually live without the storms that we realize that our
path has taken us to "the sunny side of the street," and we begin to
enjoy the rainbow as much as we used to enjoy the storm.
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